All day I have been thinking about what it was that I wanted to talk about. There are so many things that I could talk about. My walk with Christ of course... the weather... things that I have noticed lately... finally: after sitting down and actually getting to breathe I've figured it out.
Let's talk about BAE, boo, boo thang, babe, him, her, whoever, or whatever you call them.
I will say this over and over again until I am blue in the face. I am not an expert by far in anything dealing with relationships. In fact I just had one end new years eve (devastated), HOWEVER, I do notice that I follow typically the same pattern in relationships.
Meet a guy, like guy, get to know guy, guys really great for about two months, guy turns into jerk, I stay. Why stay? well he's just stressed right? No dear he's a jerk and you need to let it go. I can't tell you what to do in relationships I can only tell you what hasn't worked for me so here goes...
Moving on before moving on.
Seriously how can you move on to the next relationship if you haven't gotten over the last one? Even enough to not want to secretly slap the mess out of your ex every time you see him. Chances are that if you are in the same room with your ex and all you can think about is showing him how much he's missing with you chances are you're not ready for the relationship you think you are ready for... no matter how much you care about Jim...bob...Joe...Kevin? Forgot his name didn't you?
You know that sweet sensitive guy that you long to have? The one who understands you and communicates and is just so perfect that you can only ask why in the world are they single? Don't know about anyone else's experience but I say RUN, Don't walk RUN away from this dude, Again had plenty of these types and yes there may be someone out there for everyone however if your man wants to talk about issues over and over and over again after you thought they were resolved walk away. It's good to communicate but rehashing the same thing over and over again will get you and the relationship nowhere.
Giving too much too soon
I really really hate that somewhere between Sophior year of high school and adulthood I lost the wonderful ability to lock them girly emotions in a choke-hold and think logically when it came to men. I can go further into the reason for that but if you are grown you already know why it is that after awhile feelings, emotions, and hormones get in the way. And they are more often than not all the same thing. Clarity cannot exist when its been tainted by physical intimacy.
Playing second fiddle
It actually is not my belief that once a cheater always a cheater... it is my belief however that being with a cheater accomplishes NOTHING. Seriously, you're with this guy you can't have completely, you have to accept whatever time he gives you and you can't complain because you already know what's up. Meantime you've fallen for the guy and you're stuck can't go anywhere because you'd rather have the moment then nothing at all right? Sigh- you poor unfortunate soul. Seriously even the best of them that you know would never cheat with anyone else but you won't leave their significant other. I have people argue me up and down that there is no such thing as a man who only cheats with one person... Um yeah I've run into one. Doesn't matter how much a man loves his mistress which can in fact happen MEN DO NOT LIKE TO START OVER ONCE THEY HAVE GOTTEN TO A CERTAIN POINT IN LIFE. They will stay where they are comfortable unless you have the rare almost extincted breed of man that actually has a backbone and somewhat sense of self. Which leads me to my next don't.
STOP CHOOSING THE SAME GUY IN DIFFERENT SKIN.
Seriously if you look back at your exes tell me which ones remind you of another one? I'm going to bet you probably said at least two or three.
Last but not least the most well known advice given to anyone regarding relationships. You are what you accept, and once you accept it you can't ask for more. Men and women alike you will be treated how you accept to be treated trying to change that is the biggest struggle you would ever face and the only way that could be accomplished is if by some miracle you become/became important enough to the person to never want to let you go.
In a nutshell. Take some time out for you. I realize it's the pot calling the kettle black and I have a hard time swallowing my own pill. At least I can say that I am trying. Seriously Stop looking for BAE and look for who you are without all that static.
P.S.
I am but female and I so did not mean for this to be geared more towards woman... in my defense I only know the point of view of a woman. :-)
Let's talk about BAE, boo, boo thang, babe, him, her, whoever, or whatever you call them.
I will say this over and over again until I am blue in the face. I am not an expert by far in anything dealing with relationships. In fact I just had one end new years eve (devastated), HOWEVER, I do notice that I follow typically the same pattern in relationships.
Meet a guy, like guy, get to know guy, guys really great for about two months, guy turns into jerk, I stay. Why stay? well he's just stressed right? No dear he's a jerk and you need to let it go. I can't tell you what to do in relationships I can only tell you what hasn't worked for me so here goes...
Moving on before moving on.
Seriously how can you move on to the next relationship if you haven't gotten over the last one? Even enough to not want to secretly slap the mess out of your ex every time you see him. Chances are that if you are in the same room with your ex and all you can think about is showing him how much he's missing with you chances are you're not ready for the relationship you think you are ready for... no matter how much you care about Jim...bob...Joe...Kevin? Forgot his name didn't you?
You know that sweet sensitive guy that you long to have? The one who understands you and communicates and is just so perfect that you can only ask why in the world are they single? Don't know about anyone else's experience but I say RUN, Don't walk RUN away from this dude, Again had plenty of these types and yes there may be someone out there for everyone however if your man wants to talk about issues over and over and over again after you thought they were resolved walk away. It's good to communicate but rehashing the same thing over and over again will get you and the relationship nowhere.
Giving too much too soon
I really really hate that somewhere between Sophior year of high school and adulthood I lost the wonderful ability to lock them girly emotions in a choke-hold and think logically when it came to men. I can go further into the reason for that but if you are grown you already know why it is that after awhile feelings, emotions, and hormones get in the way. And they are more often than not all the same thing. Clarity cannot exist when its been tainted by physical intimacy.
Playing second fiddle
It actually is not my belief that once a cheater always a cheater... it is my belief however that being with a cheater accomplishes NOTHING. Seriously, you're with this guy you can't have completely, you have to accept whatever time he gives you and you can't complain because you already know what's up. Meantime you've fallen for the guy and you're stuck can't go anywhere because you'd rather have the moment then nothing at all right? Sigh- you poor unfortunate soul. Seriously even the best of them that you know would never cheat with anyone else but you won't leave their significant other. I have people argue me up and down that there is no such thing as a man who only cheats with one person... Um yeah I've run into one. Doesn't matter how much a man loves his mistress which can in fact happen MEN DO NOT LIKE TO START OVER ONCE THEY HAVE GOTTEN TO A CERTAIN POINT IN LIFE. They will stay where they are comfortable unless you have the rare almost extincted breed of man that actually has a backbone and somewhat sense of self. Which leads me to my next don't.
STOP CHOOSING THE SAME GUY IN DIFFERENT SKIN.
Seriously if you look back at your exes tell me which ones remind you of another one? I'm going to bet you probably said at least two or three.
Last but not least the most well known advice given to anyone regarding relationships. You are what you accept, and once you accept it you can't ask for more. Men and women alike you will be treated how you accept to be treated trying to change that is the biggest struggle you would ever face and the only way that could be accomplished is if by some miracle you become/became important enough to the person to never want to let you go.
In a nutshell. Take some time out for you. I realize it's the pot calling the kettle black and I have a hard time swallowing my own pill. At least I can say that I am trying. Seriously Stop looking for BAE and look for who you are without all that static.
P.S.
I am but female and I so did not mean for this to be geared more towards woman... in my defense I only know the point of view of a woman. :-)
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