Skip to main content

Teen Depression I didn't See It

In April 2013 I posted the following blog called my Views and Information on Teen depression, That blog post was meant to be informational, and maybe red flag some signs that your child may have depression. Earlier this week I would come to beat myself up over the article and its purpose. You see, with everything I wrote in that article; although it was true, I failed to see the signs of depression in my own child. At first, I went into a self-loathing mode and blamed myself for not seeing it. I had to come to realize however that even though the way my child cried out for help was extreme, she felt comfortable enough with me to cry out for help. I, as a child did not. I held everything in and didn't let anyone know my deep dark secrets of cutting. I don't know if anyone ever saw. If anyone ever knew. 
This is still hard for me to talk about and I probably will never be okay with talking about it to be truthfully honest. My daughter cut her wrist while I was at work Sunday night and texted me a video of her doing it. The scary thing is that she had no recollection of actually doing any of that. That worries me just for the fact I have Dissociative Identity Disorder and all of my actions cannot always be accounted for. In fact, there have been a couple of times in which I have woken up with marks on my arms that look like cuts. In some way, she may be showing signs of the condition herself. I digress, My daughter spent two days inpatient at a mental health facility. I hesitated at sending her there the week before, ignoring the red flags in my mind saying that she needed more help than I could give. In contrast to my beliefs, I didn't do everything exactly right and I didn't do anything exactly wrong. My daughter has a long road ahead as do I. I, myself being a former cutter know the day in and day out struggle of trying not to cut, of trying to bring feelings to the surface instead of burying them.

I'm uncertain of the path ahead for both my daughter and I but I know that we will tackle this world together. 

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Get Ready

I was walking at work one day when I heard a small still voice say "get ready". It stopped me in my tracks because there was no one else around other than myself. Get ready? Get ready for what? "Get ready". In my heart, I knew what it meant but I was and somewhat am not so much reluctant but anxious about what was ahead of me. 

Me Too Transparency

I want to be able to say that I've never been out and out raped, but at the end of the day no means no and I said it; I said no. It's moments like those that live in your mind and don't go away. You keep replaying them until you've

Mental Health Pandemic

This is more or less an impulsive post. After many years, for the first time, I decided to watch Good Will Hunting. Of course, I'd seen it referenced in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, but I'd never once actually seen the movie. I was quite shocked to see that Robin Williams was in this movie. Although the movie was an award-winning drama and was meant to play at your emotions, the entire time I couldn't help but feel saddened by the absence of Robin Williams in real life.