Skip to main content

Peace And Acceptance

Here I am on my lunch break sitting in a somber mood. There is no apparent reasoning behind it, I just sort of woke up with a cloud hanging over my head. The things that had been stressing me as of late have been resolved and although the decision was not what I wanted it was the exact conclusion God intended for me to come to. In that I truly have peace.

When I made the decision not to move I felt every bit of stress leave my body. My mind was quickly put at ease and the day seemed much brighter. I've come to realize this mornings mood is a byproduct of yesterdays decision.

Peace is NOT synonymous with acceptance. I'll say it again. Peace is NOT synonymous with acceptance. I knew I had come to the right decision because of the peace that washed over me and the lift in my mood. However, I did not accept the decision. I still want to move, i still want to force a change even though i know that it is not God's timing. I'm getting in my own way.

This move to another city was to be MY fresh start. No matter how many times I tried to convince myself it was best for all of us, deep down I knew it to be false. I had selfishly come to think my plans were the only plans blessed by God. Arrogantly I declared exactly what I knew God to be telling me to do. I could not have been more wrong... on the timing at least. I planned that in a years time u would relocate to Louisville and start over. New job, new schools for the kids; the works. Although I chose next year I mulled over this summer, next February, or next summer never really settling on  a specific timeframe. In fact, even after making the decision not to move, in the back of my mind I still had maybe I can plans. I had yet to accept the continued assignment on my life in Lexington.

You can't blame everything on the devil. I want to. I want to say the devil gave me a one tracked mind and my tunnel vision was something he used to keep me from seeing God's will. This- however, was all me. I'm the one who mentally checked out on my life here, for a life I had no true vision of. So when the decision was finally made and the will of God finally understood I found myself in this mornings somber mood. I had accepted his place but I had not accepted His decision.


Popular posts from this blog

Get Ready

I was walking at work one day when I heard a small still voice say "get ready". It stopped me in my tracks because there was no one else around other than myself. Get ready? Get ready for what? "Get ready". In my heart, I knew what it meant but I was and somewhat am not so much reluctant but anxious about what was ahead of me. 


How many of us have prayed for financial deliverance? How many of us have had faith that the Lord would give us that deliverance? As Christians, I am certain that we all have. "God, why do I struggle so much financially? X amount of dollars is not enough to live off of. Lord, I need financial deliverance!" Those are all things I've cried out and prayed before. I'm also the one who takes what little I have and puts it into the offering bucket, praying desperately along with pastor to press it down and shake it up so that it will be returned unto me tenfold. To what avail?  The truth is, I have done absolutely nothing to change my financial situation. Week after week, month after month, year after year I have prayed desperately for increase, and like so many others, yet I have been left wanting.  As I read the scriptures above I suddenly remembered The Parable Of The Talents ( Matthew 25:14-30 ). This passage is about a man who decided that while he was off

Mental Health Pandemic

This is more or less an impulsive post. After many years, for the first time, I decided to watch Good Will Hunting. Of course, I'd seen it referenced in Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, but I'd never once actually seen the movie. I was quite shocked to see that Robin Williams was in this movie. Although the movie was an award-winning drama and was meant to play at your emotions, the entire time I couldn't help but feel saddened by the absence of Robin Williams in real life.