Skip to main content

My Cup Runneth Over?


Have you ever felt hunger in the pit of your stomach? You haven't eaten all day and you find yourself ravished? I had that feeling a few days ago and even now as I write this. I couldn't figure it out because I ate that day (a couple of times yay me!) but the hunger was still there. Today however I am choosing not to eat by choice. That's a completely different topic for another day. 
I just couldn't figure out what was wrong with me... and then I asked God and He said; "Your cup is empty." Wow. I didn't think of it like that. I didn't think that my spiritual cup being empty could affect me physically but it did. I have been feeling kind of blah for quite some time now and I can trace it back to my cup slowly drying up. I'm ashamed to say that my cup is so dry it has nothing but water marks left from where it used to be full. I was not only empty of God but empty of self. Trying to fill my cup with food among other things and nothing was working. 

 I'm quite disappointed in my self for my spiritual state. Yes I believe, yes I pray, but I wasn't doing anything else. I'd stopped watching sermons on youtube I haven't been to my church home in months (although I feel called to change churches now). I allowed myself to become too empty. Now when I should be enjoying the word of God and all He has to offer me as a believer I find it difficult to even find that joy I once had in reading and studying his word. It feels as though I am reading and not retaining. This, however, does not mean that I am going to give up. On the contrary, now is the time to bear down and fight hard to stay in his word to pray and fast and seek His face, hear His voice. 

 In the past I have depended on books and sermons to ignite that fire within me to study God's Word. This time around God has shown me that sometimes the wilderness requires you to journey through it and push through it without any added help. You yourself have to do all of the fighting and God will help you along the way.  If you find that your cup is as empty as mine or if your cup is slowly becoming empty I'd have to say, one, don't let it get empty, two if it is empty work hard to fill it up again. Stop listening to that music that holds you back and start listening to you gospel and praise and worship songs again. Slowly but surely you will be filled. Don't get discouraged if you think you are too empty to ever feel that Joy you once had in Christ, you will get that back. The fact that you got there in the first place tells you that you have it in you. I hope that this has been insightful and that the words that I have spoken has changed something in you as they have definitely changed something in me. Be blessed family. Always.
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Is therapy REALLY working?

At this point I have to ask, is therapy really working?    I've been in therapy on and off since I was about 14 years old... maybe one or two years younger than that. That being said, I never really got much out of it in the teen years because let's face it, as a teen you really don't want to cooperate with any adult, let alone a "Shrink". I would go and talk about nothing of importance, pretending to sleep when it was my mother's turn to come in for the session with me. How this woman knew I wasn't sleeping was beyond me. I did what I was required to do and got my Doritos every time I went, so I was happy. Looking back at my first session, I can see the pattern that started even way back then. I have the hardest time finding competent therapists. Let me explain, from the moment I read an article in Teen Magazine about depression, I basically diagnosed myself. My being in therapy wasn't even the result of my mother thinking I had depression; it was bec...
Post a Comment
Read more

Why I Didn't Have a Bucket List

Random conversations at work tend to be the best sort of conversations. One such conversation occurred last week that has been on my mind ever since. In true ADHD fashion, I cannot tell you how this conversation came about. I can only tell you that by the conclusion of that conversation, I have been contemplating deeply on my bucket list. Two of the three of us had bucket lists, can you guess which person didn't have one? Yes, that would be me. Oddly enough, during my recent vacation to Tennessee with my best girlfriends, the mention of go-karting as something on one of their bucket lists didn't get this sort of response out of me. In fact, I thought it was cute that that was one of the things on their list. So, why was last week's conversation different? Why was that the moment I thought about what was on mine, and did I actually have one? It's taken a week to figure it all out, but this is what I came up with. First, I didn't even know what should go on my bucket ...
Post a Comment
Read more

90 Days

  Appearances will keep you bound. I share so much, yet so little, of my life. Whether it is out of "pretending" to be a private person or shame or both I couldn't tell you. Even now I'm almost certain it's that I'm not going to tell you. I have to explain some things about alcoholism . It is not as black and white as you might think it is. See my issue with drinking started back in 2010, 2011. I drank because it was fun. I drank because it was an escape. I drank because my life at that time was difficult, but I didn't drink daily. I've always been a binge drinker . I could party on the weekends and go to work like the weekend didn't happen. I even recognized back then the possibility of a drinking problem. The clearest incident in my mind was one night I had been drinking, I got sleepy and decided to go to bed, now, an alcoholic doesn't waste alcohol. I had my cup that was still about halfway full, I didn't want to guzzle the e...
1 comment
Read more