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Dear Cousin

I started off having a really great morning. I was laughing, singing, making jokes, and having a good time at work; but all that changed with one message; Hi. It seems like a harmless word and under normal circumstances it is. However, the person who sent this one seemingly harmless word is someone I have been avoiding for quite some time. Recently they tried to add me back on facebook and I haven't accepted them. The problem is this person triggers my PTSD. All the things of the past come crashing in like a tidal wave and I am helpless for the time being to do anything about it. 
It started simple enough, just a comment on how my working out inspired them to work out again, eventually it changed to "that one picture" with the hiding monkey face. I brushed it off but comments like that became more frequent and I quickly began to get uncomfortable. I thought if I just ignored him things would be okay that is until that one little word. So I decided to write this letter. 

Dear Cousin,
You probably don't mean any harm by the comments that you make but they make me feel uncomfortable. They take me back to a time when one of my cousins who shall remain nameless tried to force himself on me, not once but multiple times. I hope that bringing the impropriety of your words (and emojis) to the forefront helps you to understand that what may seem harmless to you is actually very triggering to me. Maybe you will read this and maybe you won't either way I hope that one day if you haven't read this I get the courage to speak up for myself now since I wasn't able to speak up about something that happened to me in the past. Thank you for taking the time to read this. I hope we can move forward with a better understanding. 


Disclaimer: To family members that may have read this. Please don't ask who it is or was I will not talk about it and I will not tell you. Just know that I'm on a path to healing.


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