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Open Letter To My Future Husband

It saddens me that this is my last public letter to you. I mean how else am I supposed to tell you without actually telling you how I feel about you. The thing is that I have so many things to say to you and don't have to courage to say them. I've been writing to a mystery man that is not a mystery, not to me anyway. I know who he, is in my heart I do. The only time I have ever been this sure about something was when I was pregnant with my son. I knew he was a boy from conception, I even know when he was conceived. Doctors looked at me funny but I wanted my boy and I knew I was meant to have my boy. I remember the first ultrasound in which we were to find out what he was. I looked at the screen and his little legs were gaped wide open showing he was a boy. You didn't have to be an expert to read that. LoL I don't have to be an expert to know the signs.
I know who you are, God knows who you are, and I'm waiting on you to know who I am to you. But of all of the things that I know I also know that I am not ready for you. Not yet. Spiritually I have some work to do, patience to learn, among other things. 
So my letters are going away... I wish they didn't have to but in order to get where I'm supposed to be, to have what I am supposed to have, I must withdraw certain things that could be seen as me manipulating situations to MAKE something happen before it's time. This kind of sucks because I can't subliminally post stuff to you on Facebook either. You may not know my thoughts as I think them, but just know that even though I won't post them you are still on my mind. I pray that everything you touch grows and multiplies in Christ. 

Sincerely,
Your Future Wife

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